Please note that no contact details are given, if you don't know how to get hold of the person then tough titty. Needless to say that if we don't know you or know how to get hold of you it's pretty pointless adding anything, so don't.

Click on a heading to sort by that. Please note that the very first lot of films added have no optional ratings. A 0/10 in an optional category doesn't necessarily mean a film is no good, just that it didn't feature much of that particular thing. Watch out Barry Norman!

100 Films listed

ACIDGFX - Hyper³
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	A most unusual film this one. The narrative is most definitely non-linear, heavy use of CGI with a very upbeat soundtrack. It seems the filmmakers have left the work ambiguous and open to interpretation so this is purely my take on it. Best I can tell is that it's an historical allegorical fable about ancient britain tribal culture updated for the modern era; expressed in the form of swirling images. They dance, move and morph (representing the shifting tides of territorial gains and losses, obviously) while uptempo shindigs in bon-temporary noise-itude, skiffle along by way of accompaniment. Perhaps I'm reading too much into this of course, or perhaps not enough. Either way, it's an encouragingly debut from a production house I swear I've heard of somewhere before.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DVD
Date added	25/8/2005

Apocalypse Now Redux
Person	Tomboy	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Apart from the fact that this is a 4 CD DivX, no complaints. Superb rip from master DVD includes all the original intended footage, this is possibly still one of the best films ever made. Classic lines '..cos Charlie don't surf' and others. Suggest making sure you have no plans for at least 4 hours cos this is a long one.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	7/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	DivX
Date added	20/3/2003

bendy dicks
Person	emma sargent	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	do phone me on 0161 384 8479.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	girls
Date added	9/3/2005

Blade Runner
Person	nightsex	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Pure class man, Harrision kicks butt in the classic scifi film.Great story, good affects, nice music and not a Lara in sight. Smooth....
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	8/10
Zombies & undead	8/10
Cars	8/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	DVD
Date added	10/8/2003

Brokeback Mountain
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	There's an episode of South Park, in which an independent film festival moves to the town, causing Cartman to remark that independent films are just "a bunch of gay cowboys eating pudding". Life has now imitated art, in the latest film by Ang Lee. Starring Heath Ledger and Jake "Donnie Darko" Gyllenhal, it tells of 2 sheep herders in 1960s Wyoming who, well, fall in love during those cold lonely nights. And have bottom sex. Despite each of them saying "I'm not queer" and going their separate ways into heterosexuality - they both marry and have children - they still can't forget that yearning and meet up each year to re-explore their love. Unable to commit to one another because of the times they live in, they steal these moments for themselves. So it's a love story then. A Brief Encounter updated. what distinguishes it is the gorgeous cinematography, the excellent witty and mournful script, and two world-class performances from the leads. It's slow to get going, and never gallops along, instead tracking their lives over 20 years, but once you're involved you can't take your eyes off the screen. It's fully desrving of the Oscar it surely will land. But they never eat any pudding though.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	3/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	19/1/2006

Capturing The Friedmans
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	The Friedman's are your average American suburban family, the father teaches with his son in an after-school computing class, they are well known throughout the community. Then one day, the father and son are arrested, and charged with several counts of sexual abuse pertaining to the pupils in their class. What then follows is possibly one of the most breathtaking documentaries put to film. Using the family's own home movies (something they were fans of ever since the first camcorder was sold) to augment the standard interviewing technique, director Andrew Jarecki has lifted up the metaphorical rock and observed the scurrying ants. Accusations, denials and counter-accusations all build up as the family turn on each other and a once-happy unit disintegrates in front of our eyes. With a (literal) jaw-dropping revelation by one of the characters the film moves onto another level, beyond the almost mundane search for truth among conflicting testimony, to the empathy of the terrible and grotesque only the very best films can even dream of reaching. It's a challenging and often shocking film but utterly essential viewing
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DVD
Date added	19/8/2004

constantine
Person	lhrsfrd	Comments
Overall rating	10/10
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	10/10
Cars	10/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	dv
Date added	3/4/2005

Event Horizon
Person	Tasty	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	BAD FILM SEE IT NOW !!!!!!
Bagsy	1/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DVD
Date added	11/4/2002

Fahrenheit 9/11
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Seems like it's down to Streaky to wrestle back Film 303 from the Underworld fans. Criticising a Michael Moore film for bias is a bit like criticising The Sound Of Music for singing songs; it's integral to telling the story. Moore's polemic is based on the school of thought that the media are weighted in favour of powerful elite interests that push their Snickers and Coke products on us with one hand, while pumping us full of fear with the other. If we accept that Moore's film is biased or anti-Bush (I think his opinions are, but the evidence in the film is decidedly anti-fascist, of which more later) then we must logically accept that every single news bulletin or current affairs TV show in living memory is biased too. If you ask me, one film that tears into the corrupt establishment against all the others in favour of the status quo, gets my vote. Moore's essentially states 3 widely held (and credible) views. That Bush stole the 2000 election with help from his friend; that he failed to anticipate Bin Laden's determination to attack the US, and that he used the grief of 9/11 to ram through an agenda he knew the public would never otherwise stand for (Tax Cuts, Patriot Act, Afganistan, Iraq) Amongst the photo-copied government papers and grainy footage there's a whole lot of cheap shots in George W's direction (it is the election year) and the usual Moore audience participation; in one driving an ice-cream van reading the Patriot Act out loud to Congress, and then getting them to register their children for the war in Iraq. He justifies a great amount of criticism. His evidence, particularly for Afghanistan and Bush/Saudi links, is not as convincing as he makes out; even though he's a lot more withdrawn than 'Columbine you can't help but feel he's playing his one-man "who saved the world" schtick, and he covers his lack of harder evidence with more than a few glib remarks. He also makes the mistake a lot of Democrats make, namely that everything will be OK if Bush goes. But how many documentaries get the kind of box office Moore does? How many people get the reach he does? Yes, he simplifies and popularises but he gives people things they didn't know before (trust me, the guy I was with HAD NO IDEA) and he's got people talking about the issues. Sure, for educated smooth pimp-daddies like the 303-ers it's nothing we haven't heard before but for many it's a shocking revelation, like the first time I watched Chomsky's Manufacturing Consent. But my lasting memory was neither the truth telling nor the technical competence of Fahrenheit. It was Moore's elegy for his country. Like Bill Hicks, he still holds in his heart the values, whether they were ever actually realised, of the American dream. In honesty, hard work, that virtue was it's own reward. Behind his sometimes infuriatingly smug and condescending persona there is a man bearing melancholic witness to the death of democracy and rise of Fascism in America. His fury at every war profiteer, every corrupt family friend who sit feeding at the trough while holding us in contempt should make each and every one of us mad as hell. Are we going to take it any more?
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	6/7/2004

Get Carter
Person	Jack Carter	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Must appeal to my sense of humour, but London Boy Jack Carter goes up to investigate the murder of his brother under suspicious circumstances. Fair bit of action and Jack's shotgun is noteworthy for not being fired (but used to cave someones head in). A quite violent film in a cold way that shows through in carter cleaning up the newcastle underworld as he searches for answers to his question. Well worth a watch and a fave on my list....
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	3/10
Guns & fighting	4/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	2/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	DVD
Date added	29/8/2002

Good Night And Good Luck
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Considering it's only "Gorgeous" George "damn, we're in a tight spot" Clooney's 2nd directorial project, it is astounding how good this film is. Formerly known as the guy from ER and general cheesecake, to those not in the know, Clooney will knock you flat whe you see how assured, subtle and lightly handled his style has become. His debut, Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind wasn't bad either. The story (interestingly, Clooney doesn't take the lead, only a minor-ish supporting role) is about Edward R Murrow, a 1950s TV reporter on CBS News. His decision to run a story exposing the witchhunt of suspected communists (Read: any political dissident, or just someone who questions the policies of the US government) by senator Joe Mccarthy brings him into conflict with the senior management at CBS, and exposes the contradictions and self-censorship in a so-called free country with a free press. What makes this film stand out, and why it fully deserves the oscar nominations, is not just its brevity; it's 90 minutes and not an ounce of slack. It's not just beautifully shot in black & white, reminsicent of the 1950s period (virtually everyone chain-smokes and drinks whiskey throughout the film). It's not just got first-rate performances, expecially David Strathairn in the lead. What it has, that so near to zero films have at all, is the accurate perception of the interlinked powerful forces projecting American power; those that run the military have vested interests in suppressing dissent, their friends own TV stations and media to serve theirs, and their own interests contrary to public interest; advertisers call the tune of program content; there is no censorship, you just get quietly moved along if the pursue the "wrong" story. There is no Big Brother, just market forces. And PR. What Clooney has so brilliantly done, ever so subtly, so much so many may miss it, is ask the toughest questions one can ask of his or her government; Who is in charge here? Is this is a free country or not? What does living in a democracy really mean? See it.
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	3/10
Comedy	4/10
Format	AVI
Date added	1/3/2006

Guns of Navarone
Person	Tadd	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	You wanted guns ...... Nuff said. It does exactly what it sez on the tin (first one to punch the bloke that keeps saying that wins some ronsil quick drying original wet yet tacky stuff that you paint on shit). One Bagsy though she was a peasant girl. Explosions ooooh yes plus guns and fighting - well it's war innit. Undead - well not for long. Comedy value got 1... Well taking about 12 men up a huge fekking mountain to blow up a gun is pretty amusing.. well maybe not. This isn't Tadd this is his fridge......
Bagsy	1/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	some random channel from sky
Date added	19/12/2002

Heat
Person	Jack Carter	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Serious sooper cool action flick as DeNiro and Pacino face each other off and Ueberheistmaster and Police Detective (respectively) in this cat and mouse game. Lots of high octane action and the car chase scene when the robbers are breaking out of the bank had my neighbours banging on the wall (machineguns via the stero amp at full) Ace film - Very slick Remake of LA Takedown, but better
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	1/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	DVD
Date added	29/8/2002

Lord of the rings - Fellowship of the ring
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Superb uality & sounds for this awesome film
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	9/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DIVX/dvdrip
Date added	8/4/2002

mask
Person	jim carrey	Comments
Overall rating	10/10
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	avi
Date added	10/1/2006

Meet the Streakys
Person	Them	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Noit what I was expecting - Barbera Streaky and Bob streaky making an acting comeback but in actual fact it was a real streaky's streaky. The Streakiness of the streakies showed remarkable streakiness by the "are we having fun yet" posse. timtim. \o/
Bagsy	2/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	5/10
Zombies & undead	7/10
Cars	2/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	Live performance
Date added	6/5/2005

Moulin Rouge
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Having now watched the *whole* of it it now makes a bit more sense and hence earned it's 10/10 status. To reiterate - possibyl one of the best pieces of cinematography ever, superb use of the music which is a freeform mental flow which works because it's so bonkers. Excellent depth of characters and enough plot twists for all..sooper, thanks for asking.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	Divx (dvdrip)
Date added	22/4/2002

Moulin Rouge
Person	Tasty	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	I hate musicals and Nicole Kidman (Used to changed mind after watching the film) Soundtrack has been fatboy slimmed in places. I bought it on DVD ,Incredible film what a concept and has Absynthe in it. One of the most WOW films i have seen in many a blue moon
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	1/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	2cd Divx
Date added	11/4/2002

Sin City
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	About a good a comic-book adaptation you're going to get. Too many starring turns to mention all, but special props to Mickey Rourke as an unusual looking avenger, Elijah Wood as a silent Freddy Krueger/Spiderman/Hannibal Lector creepy weird, and Bruce Willis' best performance since Pulp Fiction as an ageing cop assigned to protect a kidnapped girl. Way too much in a single review, you've all probably seen it already, or at the very least intend to. You've all heard of it, you've probably already decided for yourself it's utterly brilliant, so there's not really much point to this review at all. I guess I wanted to feel like I belonged to something, or just to show the big kids that I'd seen it too.
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	7/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	1/7/2005

spartacus
Person	christ	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	ist going goodd
Bagsy	1/10
Explosions & carnage	2/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	1/10
Cars	10/10
General wierdness	1/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	film
Date added	5/3/2005

Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	So there's these imperial guys sitting on the new death star, when Vader walks in and says to them not to be proud of this technological terror, as it is "insignificant" next to the power of the force. The sheer balls of one of the generals to accuse him of "sad devotion" to an ancient religion, is literally breathtaking. Does he not remember a mere 20 years previously the guy in the black suit wiping out the Jedi with little or no mercy? Why does Han Solo, who must be aged about 35, not believe in the force, given these events occurred when he must have been about 15? And why does Vader tell Obi-wan that when he left him he was but the learner, when actually when he left him he was tons more powerful and had saved his arse a bunch of times? There's these tpye of questions, and others, that pop up as you watch A New Hope, but it's pretty good all the same.
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	20/5/2005

Streaky boils vietnamese balls
Person	Me	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	This is a short epic in which a normally relatively quiet chap from the UK gets upset by some vietnamese hoteliers/restauranteurs. His tale of vengeance begins when they start posting on his film review board and sees him travel to the orient on a quest which will lead him to a boil the balls of said gits. An absolute classic from the director who brought you "Passworded websites"
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	3/10
Cars	6/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	9/10
Format	Real life footage
Date added	1/5/2005

The Dark Knight
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	It's a funny thing, being dead. Funny, and tragic. The accidental overdose of Heath Ledger at the shockingly young age of 28 robbed us of one of the most promising, if not already the best, actors of his generation. The funny thing, like James Dean, Bill Hicks, Kurt Cobain & others taken too soon, is they are permanently frozen in time; they will never get old, get fat, sell us out by reneging on their pledged principles, and worst of all they will never be boring. If there were a god he'd have had Ben Elton torn apart by wolves shortly after finishing the final draft of Stark, giving him a fitting epitaph and saving us from all the mediocre and plain awful books that followed, as well as certain musicals and Royal Variety performances for which he should be raped by bears. If Ledger had not left us, had not taken too many pills to nurse his chronic back pain, he would have been given some tremendous press, but no Oscar nomination. A nomination that now seems all but assured. That's a pity, because Ledger doesn't just deserve a nomination, he deserves an entire new academy category all to himself. He isn't just great as The Joker (he is) he makes the combined talent of Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, Christian Bale, Maggie Gyllenhal & Aaron Eckhart look average. He makes Jack Nicholson look like he's not really trying. He manages the damn near impossible feat of making him scary (genuinely scary) and funny (genuinely funny) while not lapsing into parody or pantomime villainy. Every time you think he's about to chew scenery, he steps back from it. He has the walk, the hobble of a damaged soul; the creepy lick of the lips and a focus that is beyond intense. As comparison, the almost always excellent Bale is perfectly fine as Bruce Wayne but slightly silly intoning the baritone of the caped crusader. Likewise, the aforementioned ensemble are all great, they just look, well, average next to Ledger. As action goes, it's up there. Cars, bikes, bombs, robberies and high-wire acrobatics raise the pulse. The story is light years beyond your usual blockbuster chewing gum and doesn't bother to waste characters explaining ther plot, you're just expected to keep up. It covers fascinating ideas such as the staining of the soul that the fight for justice involves, how far any of us would go for our principles; it's not so much that the lines between good and evil are blurred, they live in a greater world of order fighting chaos, personified by Batman & The Joker. The idealistic lawyer Harvey Dent is the one trapped in the middle, and what happens to him is the product of that fight. It is, however, perhaps the only criticism I can find, that it tries to have too much of a good thing. It doesn't tie up the story as well as it could, going instead for one more set piece after another, leaving a slightly saggy resolution. It's churlish though, with Gary Oldman doing his best stuff in years as Commissioner Gordon and the only one who can come close to The Joker to pick up rather minor problems as this. At time of writing, the talk is that The Dark Knight might even go past the $600 Million of Titanic, thought unbeatable until recently. Death; box office gold.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	8/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	28/7/2008

The Last Temptation Of Streaky
Person	Me	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	In which the eponymous hero is tempted, for the last time
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	Real Life
Date added	5/5/2005

The Matrix Reloaded
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Changes everything.
Bagsy	8/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	8/10
Cars	8/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	VCD
Date added	20/5/2003

There Will Be Blood
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	It has been written that we are living in a new cinematic golden age, as the recent Hollywood productions have been of such quality, power and style they hark back to the "good old days" of Bogart, Cagney & Hepburn. Whilst I think in those days there were almost certainly an equal number of hopeless bodge efforts (so much so, they were classified as B-movies, a genre unto itself) not forgetting the instantly forgettable contemporaries such as Pirates Of The Shite & Alien Vs Badgers, (or anything starring Jessica Alba) you can't deny there's been some blinding efforts of late. It likely owes more to the sheer number of films produced these days and their availability thanks to Internet buzz. Paul Thomas Anderson, the wonder director of Boogie Nights, Magnolia & Punch Drunk Love was going to get press for his next project whatever, especially as we've had to wait 5 years for it. UK film-goers have had to wait months since the US release, and the straw-chewing sister marriers in the provinces that bit longer, as Blood was only released in London at first. Furthermore, Northampton cinemas didn't show it at all, so I had to watch this at Milton Keynes Cineworld in the Snowdome. You may be wondering about the lengthy pre-amble, or the perfect score, so I thought it best to give this one The Big Robinski as you need to see this film as urgently as polite society will allow. Quick point of order: can you give a film 10/10 even if you find things to criticise about it? If not, then no 10/10 film could exist as there is no perfect film by any objective or subjective standard. Enough. What the hell is it about? Daniel Day Lewis (you thought Forrest Whittaker was a certainty, this guy will win the Oscar or Los Angeles will burn) is Daniel Plainview, oil prospector and single parent. His drive to find black gold in turn of the 20th century California leads him to nemesis Eli Sunday (Paul Dano); a meek and (seemingly) submissive church preacher. As the drilling begins, and the cash starts rolling in, Plainview's greed and obsession starts to eay away at his soul. The film isn't about plot, moreover it's a timeless moral fable about the corruption of mankind, be it by money, religion or naked power. It should come as no surprise that Day-Lewis conveys the paranoia and fear of a man consumed, and at the same time, enthralled by greed, so perfectly you can almost see the cogs inside his brain turning and ticking over. He's matched in some memorable scenes by Dano, his counterpoint, and reminder of the corrosive power of superstition. It's blackly funny, thought provoking, and the first 20 minutes without dialogue is like watching a new type of cinema. Yes, it does drag a bit in the middle, and there may be some who find Plainview a little over-the-top in the final third. I'm certain on repeat viewings (which I intend to take as soon as possible) this will become the Citizen Kane of its time. A timeless classic.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	6/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	20/2/2008

Trust Unto Chaos
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Undoubtably the finest work to come out of Whitehills Studios this year, what it lacks in plot, bagsies and zombies it makes up for with a banging soundtrack courtesy of Dom Almond (of Sessions fame) and some check-a-check-ma-bad-self trippy visuals courtesy of yours truly. This is 60 minutes of banging wibblyness for all those post-club chillouts or for in-club projections. On sale for a measly pony at www.acidgfx.com (well it will be when I've finished the covers) - check in next few days. And if that wasn't a blatant abuse of technology, my position and a shameless plug then I'm Frank Sinatra wearing a feather boa.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DVD
Date added	16/7/2004

Underworld
Person	TF12	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Fucking genius... Vampyres verses Werewolves in the style of The Matrix with Kate Beckinsale dressed in PVC shooting the shit out of everything that moves! Er, what's not to like?!? Ok, maybe the script but then what do you expect. Oh, and the effects but, you know, maybe I over analysis them anyway. Only way this film could really have been better is if I'd been mashed watching it! um really? Ok it's shite but go and see it anyway. Goths rule.
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	10/10
Cars	2/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	28/9/2003

Wallace & Gromit:: The Curse Of The Were-Rabbit
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	10/10	Believe the hype. Enough grown-up muppet-style jokes for grown-up muppets, a fully fleshed-out story, tons of sight gags and in-jokes, inoffensive knock-about fun for all the family. They make this out of plasticine you know. Each frame is done individually apparently. They call it stop-motion. They must have the patience of a saint, or lots of soft gateway drugs
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	6/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	19/10/2005

a beautiful mind
Person	henry	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	no
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	9/10
Format	divX
Date added	19/1/2003

American History X
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	A bit of an Oioi if you haven't seen it for a kick arse, righteous and blood lusty film that (bonus) makes you think about your predjudices. Starring Edward "Fight Club" Norton, Edward "OK, timeout stop the bike" Norton from T2 and Captain "Avery Brooks" Sisko from DS9. The story of a reformed neo-nazi released from jail determined to stop his younger brother going down the same road set against a racially inflamed school. What makes the film stand apart is that the neo nazis are not one dimensional cardboard cutouts but real people with real grievances seeking justice in an unfair world. Great and intense scenes, real ultra violence smoothly directed and interspersed with B/W flashbacks. It's careful to show the consequences of violence and the alternatives to one's actions. Informative without being preachy. It really is the shit.
Bagsy	1/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	3/10
Comedy	3/10
Format	dvd
Date added	6/5/2003

Big Fish
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Call me a sentimental old badger if you really have to, but there's something about Father/Son relationships that make me go a big rubbery one, (Fight Club, before you start) especially if they have giants, witches and Ewan "That's hardly a substitute" Mcgregor with an Alabama accent doing his best stuff in years. It's Tim "Beetlejuice & fuck loads else" Burton at the helm, also has his bird Helena Bonham Carter and Albert Finney as an dying father whose estranged son wants to straighten things up by finding out if the stories told him as a little boy really happened, were embellished, or just plain invented by a deranged mind. The beauty, as acted out by Mcgregor as the younger Finney, is that you never really know for sure, and by the end you don't care. Storytelling is so much more than an entertaining yarn before you go to sleep, whether real or imagined, and while fiction contains grains of truth and vice versa it's most important of all that stories are told to never lose our sense of imagination and wonder.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	5/10
Guns & fighting	3/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	9/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	5/2/2004

Bruno
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	If Borat's mission for Sacha Baron Cohen was to expose the racist underbelly of American society, then Bruno is his attempt to uncover its homophobia. Transformed from a Kazak to an Austrian (the most famous since Hitler) he journeys across the US on a mission to be a celebrity by any means possible. If that means hitting on a presidential candidate, making Paula Abdul use a Mexican as a chair, asking a mother's permission to use liposuction on her baby or photographing his African orphan being crucified then so be it. Not only is the film intensely funny, you have to give Cohen credit for endangering his life in pursuit of laughs; he's chased by observant Jews in Israel, an incident that doesn't look at all staged. Tighter than Borat, the film does not lose focus in the last 30 minutes as its predecessor did, and more pointed. Borat exposed, if not actual racism, then people's apathy to it, where Bruno shows Americans more than happy to applaud bikinis as patriotic but gays as something underhand. The look of an American's face where Straight Dave becomes Gay Bruno says it all.
Bagsy	9/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	5/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	7/8/2009

Changeling
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	I have a frequent habit of boiling down often complicated issues in my reviews to snappy, and often glib, phrases. That, and a tendency for meta-commentary and fourth-wall breaking. So I must resist the urges swelling inside me to describe Changeling as a female Shawshank Redemption, or a triple header of Gone Baby Gone (to be reviewed) meets One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest crossed with Mystic River. An Oscar-worthy Angelina Jolie is a single mother in 1928 Los Angeles who reports her young son missing. After a few agonising months, the LAPD report that her son has been found. When she is reunited, however, she insists that the returned boy is not her son. The boy maintains his story, in spite of some pretty serious physical evidence to the contrary, corroborated by his teacher and dentist. The more Jolie protests, the more she uncovers the corruption at the heart of the LAPD, and the more they tries to make the issue about her mental competence. It says a good deal about the attitude to women at the time that her emotional state is seen as the inherent weakness of her gender and not a reaction to truly tragic events. The film doesn't stop there though. It heads into new territory, becoming less that of an individual's fight against a cruel system and more an action/thriller about a missing person. If there is a criticism, it is that this multi-genre approach does lose a little of the focus the first hour had kept. It is, though, a minor criticism, as Clint Eastwood's latest outing as director is as good as anything he's done in recent times, which is saying quite a bit. This film is by no means an easy watch, and as Simon Mayo put it, "there's an awful lot of Shawshank before the Redemption", but Eastwood's unsentimental and steady hand keep the story going, while Jolie is captivating as a woman forced to find new depths of courage in a scenario most of us can scarcely imagine.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	4/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	8/12/2008

Charlie & The Chocolate Factory
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	I was in serious worried the film would be buried in a Burton/Depp wankfest, but I'm proud to say it's one of the book-to-film adaptations I've seen. Running as close to the book as possible, as well as expanding the story of the strange and mercurial Mr Wonka (apparently, his dad was a dentist, and forbid him having sweets) Burton has managed to bring Dahl's crazy world of oompah-loompahs, chocolate waterfalls and nut-cracking squirrels to life on screen. This isn't one of your cynical, sneering reviews. It was one of my favourite books as a child, and Burton has done those memories justice.
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	5/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	4/8/2005

Charlies Angels II: Full Throttle
Person	TF12	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Birds fighting other birds in tight pants. Ace. Very funny, totally ridiculous. Apparently the burlesque dancers in the club also dance at Johnny Depp's club in LA... I want to go there. Stonking good romp.
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	2/10
Comedy	9/10
Format	Downloaded DVD
Date added	7/11/2003

Closer
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Given the array of talent on offer in Closer; Jude Law, Julia Roberts & Natalie Portman, it is surprising that most of the plaudits must go to the 4th member of the cast, Clive Owen. Simply put, this guy acts the living shit out of anyone he's put up against, and is fully deserving of every award he's entitled to. Closer concerns that unfathomable and ineffable study of love and intimacy, and on a more general level the search for true happiness in a cruel world. The 4 leads move in and out of each other's lives in turns, and through coincidence, fate/destiny, betrayal and confession are forever changed and re-defined. I'm using lots of long words to describe "a relationship movie" but it's because there's so much on life, love and romance it's pointless explaining what happens, you just have to see it for yourself. Maybe it's because I have a girlfriend and now can see all the whys and wherefors (and doyoumindifidon'ts) where 3 months ago I never would have got it. If you want a better and more direct/honest summary, you see Natalie Portman as a stripper and doing her thing in a club very well indeed.
Bagsy	9/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	6/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	24/2/2005

Cloverfield
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	On Newsnight Review, one of the talking wonks called this "9/11 porn" in a rather critical way. They were absolutely right, right down to the destruction of iconic landmarks (statue of liberty, that's in the trailer so I'm not spoling too much); plumes of smoke; vertical collapse of towers; tearful voicemails to loved ones, and all-out screaming, terror and panic. It is, however, bloody excellent all the same. You must see this in the cinema, as I think a lot will be lost at home. I can personally vouch for the unsettling feeling - people I know have been literally sick after seeing it - as the shaky camerawork adds to the hyper-reality. What the film makers have done very deliberately, is make the opening 20 minutes as arsehole-heavy as possible, so when the "shit goes down" you're rooting for them to be wiped out, so it's a great testament that people this unsympathetic hold your attention for the taut 84 minute run time. A Blair Witch for 2008.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	18/2/2008

Collateral
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Tom "Hehehehe" Cruise finally comes of age as an actor in Michael "Heat" Mann's latest, pairing up with taxi-driver Max (Jamie Foxx) on one murder-filled night in LA. Completely convincing as ruthless and charming hit man Vincent, Cruise takes Foxx hostage as he moves down a hit list, offering advice along the way on how Max can improve his life after being stuck as a cabbie for 12 years. The chemistry and intensity between the two leads is so powerful and engaging the B-story of the detectives shadowing them feels like a distraction and you wish they'd get back to Tom, dispatching his targets with a chilling efficiency, and looking at times scarily like De Niro at times, only more persuasive. It wouldn't stand without Jamie Foxx as put upon all around good egg Max, discovering talents he never knew he had in one particularly memorable scene. Michael Mann shows us the urban LA landscape at night; notice the swirling helicopters and Vincent misanthropic rant against the city and what it stands for. Will Smith's wife Jada Pinkett is in it too.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	7/10
General wierdness	6/10
Comedy	6/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	25/9/2004

Donnie Darko
Person	Funky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Now that this has been released on DVD an update is necessary. It was director Richard Kelly's first film. He wrote it as well, and had no money to make it. It cost $4M. The actors didnt get paid any money for shooting, They did the film cause the story was so good. There are 20 extended and deleted scenes on the DVD which explain so much more. As a taster, the pills which Donnie takes are placebos. He isnt mad. He is a superhero tasked by a greater power to repair an alternate reality that has occured by accident. Oh and by the way Frank, the rabbit, is Donnie's sisters boyfriend. Loads of watership down stuff also never made the film. It was never meant to be so complicated , the film was too long so cuts were made. With these scenes included it is much more simplistic and takes on more of a sci-fi feel than supernatural.Ive only touched on the extra plot here. For the full uncut film I propose a selatape special which will have all the deleted scenes stuck firmly back in their rightfull place. Watch this space. An excellent film just got better.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	4/10
Guns & fighting	2/10
Zombies & undead	9/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	Legit purchased DVD
Date added	27/5/2003

Donnie Darko
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Greg's right - this is another masterpiece from Mr Lynch. I reckon it's slightly more followable than Mullholland Dr. but all the better for it. Watch it today. [..erm slight correction there - it's not David lynch directing it at all - it's some other bloke (thought it made a bit much sense). Hats off to a good job.]
Bagsy	4/10
Explosions & carnage	2/10
Guns & fighting	2/10
Zombies & undead	1/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	Divx DVDrip
Date added	29/11/2002

Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	We can now add another film filed under the heading "Films Where Jim Carrey Doesn't Play An Utter Cock" making a grand total of 2; this one, and The Truamn Show. In some ways, it actually makes me hate him even more when you precisely how talented this guy is as he conveys the pain of the lonely and introverted character Joel, as compared to the rubbish he does most of the time, in this love story with the quirky Clementine (Kate "I want your hands on me Jack" Winslet) What makes screenwriter Charlie "Being John Malkovich, Adaptation" Kaufman so amazing is how normally he treats memory erasure (and subsequent in-head flight to preserve those special memories) romance, acton and comedy like it's done every day. One of the most original films of this or any year Kaufman shows us what the people close to us really mean, and the call for better communication. I won't say any more, except to say that this review just scratched the surface of the craziness within, and with Elijah "but it cannot stay in the Shire" Wood, Kirsten "I want some more" Dunst and Tom "Full Monty" Wilkinson in supporting roles what more could you possibly want from a movie. See it at all costs.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	5/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	2/5/2004

Event Horizon
Person	PCUK	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Myself and my trustworthy Uncle Tasty feel this is one of the best, most underrated pieces of creative art, and influential yet unrecognised films for years. The Main Points are 1. Larry Fishburne is in it. He also leads The Matrix (see below-nice one) and dies spectacularly in Apocalypse Now. Who better?..helped by Sam Neill, Joely Richardson - bagsy (yet another of Vanessa Redgrave's daughters and superb) Sean Pertwee, and surprisingly, a black dude (odds against reaching climax of film pretty high) and more white guys, some of whom die to even up the racial statistics for a change. 2. No films have taken the Alien concept further than Ridley Scott did in Alien in ?1976 - until this. Set off looking for something, don't know what it is, by the time you find out, you realise that your life insurance is utterly inadequate. 3...Zero gravity in realtime effects before The Matrix was even written. 4 Even dead people make an appearance to f you up a bit more...hence undead rating. On top of this, the rules of time and space start to become optional (like being drunk only 8 million miles from your front door) No one knows where you are, yet it's your job to be there rescuing people, AND some bastard has broken into your memory and is replaying events you tried to hide even from yourself. Chris Eagle famously left after an hour of our first screening at the Cube. Available now from Statto towers, when I find it in a box somewhere. British Film, Brit Director, Brit Actors all over the place. Massive.
Bagsy	8/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	7/10
Zombies & undead	8/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	(Oh! Have we got a...) Video - DVDs can FROff.
Date added	9/4/2002

Fight Club
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Superb film, chaosmongers watch now!
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	1/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	VCD (dvdrip)
Date added	8/4/2002

Finding Nemo
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	I'm not going to bother revieiwng Kill Bill, Matrix or 'Rings 'cos you'll watch them even if I told you it was Keanu pissing into a bucket for 90 minutes, so I'll stick to the films you're unsure whether to see. The 5th film from Pixar (Toy Story 1&2, A Bug's Life, Monsters Inc, fact fans) and no let up in the quality whatsoever, casting an eye over the family relationaships of Fish. Dad Marlin over-protects his adventurous only child Nemo after losing his wife and family in a Shark attack. But wouldn't you know, Nemo disobeys Dad and goes off on his own, getting himself captured by a fishing trawler, necessitating Marlin overcome his fears of the big bad world to rescue his son. On the way he meets a forgetful Goldfish Dorey, a trio of reforming Sharks (Fish are friends, not food) and an ultra laid-back bale of turtles. Great fun, thoughtful, and tear-inducingly emotional. I didn't cry. Honest.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	2/11/2003

Garden State
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	The Bagsy is for one actress, and one actress alone. The divinely scrumptious Natalie "Is life always this hard?" Portman. I could spend the entire review pontificating on her loveliness, but we simply haven't the space. Instead, I'll tell you about the film she's starring in instead, the writer/director/actor Zach Braff virtuoso project about grief, redemption and 20-something kookyness. A lazy man such as myself would describe it as part Donnie Darko, part Station Agent, part Eternal Sunshine, but with a twist (oh I'd be so good writing for the Radio Times, their guy is shit) Actor Andrew Largeman (Braff) returns to his home-town for the funeral of his mother, the first time he has seen his father (Ian "Bilbo" Holm) for 10 years. He meets the free-spirited Sam (Portman) and well, erm, watch it for yourself. Full of wondeful little delights, very strong yet understated performances, it's a great example of new US indie cinema. But alas, we don't get to see the twins.
Bagsy	9/10
Explosions & carnage	6/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	VCD
Date added	25/11/2004

Getaway in Stockhom
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	A 400bhp Escort Cossie and a 500bhp Supra absolutely *tanking* thru Stockholm early in the morning - *superb* if that floats your boat - if you don't like cars it's likely to be the single dullest thing you could possibly choose to watch.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	10/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	VCD
Date added	8/4/2002

Hard Candy
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Similar to the Narnia film, I have to state a legal disclaimer for the bagsy rating, hence the zero. You'll find out why in a minute. For the most part, this is a strict two-handed affair. A 30-something man-nonce (Patrick Wilson) meets a 14 year-old lolita-wannabe (Ellen Page) over the internet and they arrange to meet. What starts out as a distinctly uncomfortable seduction quickly becomes something altogether more sinister and shocking, as the tables are turned, and this predator is shown as the creep he truly is. It's testament to Wilson's quality as an actor that Jeff is not a complete low-life, and you have the feeling he may in fact be innocent throughout the film. Ellen Page is simply brilliant as Hayley, the "wise beyond her years" sassy teen who also happens to be completely insane. As a man, there are a great many leg-crossing eye-watering moments, but they're absolutely essential. Women will love it. Men will never appreciate their testicles more after seeing it.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	3/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	9/7/2006

Hot Fuzz
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	You can't argue handing over your £6 plus something for probably the best British film of its genre for years. But which genre? It's a fish out of water comedy as Nicholas Angel (Simon "Spaced" Pegg), is forced to leave London as he's so good as a Police Officer he makes everyone else look bad. Assigned to sleepy Gloucestershire village Sandford, he teams up with adoring Danny (Nick "Spaced" Frost), as well as every comedy actor from Green Wing & Black Books they could find. The second genre is the detective murder mystery, where a series of accidents look suspiciously like foul play, but Angel has to convince his skeptical cake-eating colleagues to believe him. As the film stretches into the second hour, it moves into Bad Boys territory as the guns get locked and loaded. Containing a homage (rather than a pardoy where it would lazily recycle the images without the wit) to almost every buddy cop movie, as well as the typical Spaced humour, it's a laugh throughout first and foremost. But it's such a step forward from their last film Shaun Of The Dead, it seems condescending to call it a comedy. The action, photography & direction is first-rate, even if it maybe does tire toward the end. See it.
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	6/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	18/2/2007

I, Robot
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Really didn't think it was going to be this good. I'm a fan of Will "Can I Fuck You?" Smith, dig where the guy comes from and what he tries to do, and was quite happy for a bit of wisecracking "Bad Boys In The Future" to fill a couple of hours. What I got was a comprehensive action-packed whodunnit thriller that asks serious questions about AI and gives some very interesting answers. A technology paranoid robot-hating Smith investigates the apparent suicide of the head of a robotics company days before the latest models are shipped, and though you know there's more to it than it appears the script stays one step ahead. Tightly directed and very well paced, never too far from guns or a one-liner with some gorgeous visuals they nicked from Minority Report. Best action flick of the year so far.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	8/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	8/8/2004

Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	He's back He's bad He's older than my Dad He's Doctor Jones, Doctor Jones. Harrison Ford has still got it. If you've seen the trailer there's a shot of an obviously frail Indiana leaping onto a truck. That shot isn't in the film, most likely a diversionary tactic by Spielberg/Lucas to throw you off the scent. Shia Le Boeuf isn't a cock in this film, I'm thrilled to say. Ray "I've eaten Vegetarians" Winstone, John "ow my chest" Hurt & Cate Blanchett are along for the ride, and there's even a cameo from Alan "Jim Robinson from Neighbours" Dale whcih now means there must have been a law passed that says he must be in everything (Lost, Ugly Betty, 24). I won't bore you with the plot, just watch it. It's bloody great.
Bagsy	6/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	4/10
General wierdness	9/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	23/5/2008

King Kong
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Jim Carrey, Robin Williams and now Jack Black have crossed the line from "cock" to "serios actor" with all the accompaniyng whines of "well, if you could do that why have you been a cock all these years". Watch out for Black returning to "cock" any moment soon, just like his peers. Until then, he's Carl Denham, a film director with big problems; his latest film is nowhere near done, and the studio are drumming their fingers and talking about the sack. So he gets hold of unemployed vaudeville actress Naomi Watts, script writer Adrien Brody, and a posse of salty seamen to sail to the mythical Skull Island, where his secret map promises some seriously good location shooting. As you'd expect from Peter "11 Oscars for Return Of The King" Jackson, he takes his time getting to the island, and after an hour or so all hell breaks loose when we see Kong. Reminiscent of the LOTR trilogy as well as Jurassic Park and Indiana Jones, Jackson pins us to our seat unleashing one action set-piece after another, still finding time for some genuine moments of tenderness between Watts and Kong. The 3 hours mercifully fly by, something he's learned from Return Of The King. Jackson has created a classic here, the only question is whether it'll be bigger tahn Titanic.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	6/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	29/12/2005

Lord Of War
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Goodfellas with guns. Uri Orlov (Nicolas "Francis Ford Coopola's nephew" Cage) is an arms dealer, 30 years man and boy. He lies to his wife about what he does, he lies to the camera, in his narration, but mostly he lies to himself about the business he's in, absolving any responsiblity that he might be part of the problem. In an unforgettable opening sequence, you get an educational journey from the point of view of a bullet as it makes it's way through the factory and beyond, until it reaches the final destination in some poor bastard's skull. Uri is chased down by idealistic Interpol agent Ethan "Gattaca" Hawke, but always seems able to stay one step ahead of (or is that above?) the law. It's a film that bombards you with facts and statistics about the arms industry, and while it occasionally borders on the glib or fatuous, as well as borrowing heavily from the aforementioned 'Fellas or more recently Blow, it's the first film I've ever seen to tackle such a subject.
Bagsy	9/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	20/10/2005

Moulin Rouge
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	My copy's rubbish quality, but it's a *superb* film despite my 2 hour nap in the middle, waking up just before the end. I didn't hold out much hope for Obie Wan McRenton singing (nor whatsername) but it actually worked. I'm looking for a DVDrip to watch it again, this time not after having worked 28 hours straight.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DIVX but low res
Date added	8/4/2002

Mystic River
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Hmm, probably given all the zeroes not an immediate one that springs to mind to recommend to the 303 patrons but I'm bored counting the days to Return Of The King (T-minus 16) so here goes. Clint Eastwood directs Tim "Shawshank" Robbins, Sean "They fuck you and they fuck you" Penn, Kevin "You got to smell it" Bacon, Laurence "Here they come" Fishburne and others in a tale of abuse, murder, revenge; you know, all the good stuff. A teenage girl is murdered and the cops start to unwravel a mystery involving the inhabitants of a local neighbourhood that goes back to a childhood incident that changed three young boys lives forever, all in different ways. Kind of like Sleepers but a bit harder edged and nasty. About the choices we make, bad choices mostly, and their consequences. Depressing as fuck if you're in the wrong mood I guess, but I thought it was superb.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	5/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	1/12/2003

Network
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	"I want you at home, all of you, to go over to your window, pull it open, and yell out into the street". "I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore" And so begins Network, winner of 4 oscars in the 1970s. The story of the mental breakdown of a TV anchorman - veteran of nearly 20 years presenting banality as excitement. When he is told his show is cancelled he flips out, and harnessed by an ambitious TV Exec, he becomes the Mad Prophet, speaking his mind on the evils of TV and the controlling elites or as he puts it "I just ran out of bullshit". If you love cynical, revelatory films (think Bob Roberts, the explosives making in Fight Club, American History X) as well their comment on erosion of morality and ethics in materialistic society, this is for you. If you hate with a passion Reality TV shows with all their tacky and schadenfreude voyeurism, then you'll lvoe this. It's one of those you'd file under "ahead of it's time and srill relevant today".
Bagsy	2/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	DVD
Date added	23/4/2003

No Country For Old Men
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Nominated for 8 oscars (albeit most of them for technical awards) this looks like the year and the film that the Coen Brothers get the recognition and praise many feel they deserve. No Country feels like a culmination of their technical craft that started way back when in 1984 with Blood Simple. It's a film that draws many comparisons to their debut too. Like many of their films it's less concerned with the plot (little of it that there is; guy finds some drug money and waits for the hitman to come get him while the Sheriff tries to figure out what happened) and more concerned with the scenery and setting. Like so many other Coen films, its set in the past, 1980, and the scenery is West Texas. It's a modern Western (perhaps explaining the Oscar nods for genre cinema) with sparse dialogue and bone-dry humour, often with just the high plains for company. As for what the film says, or tries to say, it becomes more problematic. Tommy Lee Jones' Sheriff muses over the times we now live in, how things ain't what they used to be, about the casual (almost banal) evil creeping into modern society. Exemplified of course by Javier Bardem's cold, ruthless killer. The film (like the book upon which it is based) ruminates upon chance and fate in life, as well as the feeling that "things were ever thus" as a counter-point to TLJ's elegy for the simpler life. I think it hinges for the audience on whether you like the Coens or not. I do, and for me the film is a near masterpiece. For others (and as I do not appreciate the films of Ridley Scott for example, I can well understand) they may find it a sterile, empty film, more concerned with film making for its own sake rather than with a story to tell. The Coen Brothers are often a divisive bunch in this regard, much as Wes Anderson can be too. You either "get" them or you don't I guess.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	AVI
Date added	28/1/2008

Pan's Labyrinth
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	I only got the chance to see this last night, when Sixfields (don't know and don't care who owns it this month) cinema had a 9pm daily showing for one week only. Probably because it's a Spanish film with subtitles, and not a braindead Stiller vehicle or piss-poor rom-com a la The Holiday. What it is, is one of the best films of the year. You can tell whether subtitled films are any good by whether it's an effort to read the lines or not. You barely notice in this film. It's set in 1944 Spain, at the end of the civil war where the Fascists led by Franco have all but crushed the Republican resistance, and are left mopping up the stragglers as they flee to the woods. The Army "cappy-tan" arrives with his pregnant wife in tow - and daughter from an earlier marriage, Ofelia - not flinching from summary executions and torture to get his bloody job done. This is Ofelia's story, a fairy tale come to life as she discovers the Labyrinth and learns she is in fact a reincarnated princess from the underworld. A world of insects as angels, fauns and weird looking monsters. It seems unbelievable that this can co-exist with a largely brutal and hard-hitting A-story of goody resistance vs baddy fascist army, but it really does. The fantasy world Ofelia escapes to works both as a metaphor and in reality as the method for her to escape the cruel world life has brought her. It's superbly shot and acted, (the sadistic Captain especially) with well-drawn characters you care about. Ofelia, of course, steals the film. Maybe because it's a Spanish film, telling a period of history not normally covered, that makes it feel so fresh and original. It's the sort of film that in English would maybe feel tired and repetitive. Now I'm off to see The Devil's Backbone
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	7/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	21/12/2006

Requiem For a Dream
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	This is one *fucked up* film. Very nicely shot, great characters, *twisted* storyline, faaar too many drugs in play. Highly recommended but not for the faint-hearted.
Bagsy	6/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	8/10
Zombies & undead	1/10
Cars	1/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	Divx
Date added	14/6/2004

Resident Evil 2
Person	Tasty	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Guns and zombies,Milla getting em out too - nuff said
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	10/10
Cars	1/10
General wierdness	1/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	16/10/2004

Shaun Of The Dead
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Not being a zombie fan, I couldn't be arsed with Dawn Of The Dead (remake or original)have never seen Night Of The Living Dead or and only watched Evil Dead 3 when my friend held me down and made me (it was shit). So I went to see this based on the track record of Spaced star Simon Pegg knowing it would have all the cast in some role, and I'm happy to say it's fantastic. Predictably, but none the worse for it, there's guest appearances from cast members of Black Books, League Of Gentleman, The Office and Little Britain, as well as Penelope "we're about to have lunch" Wilton and Bill "Love Is All Around" Nighy as two plug-in gravitas actors. The plot, should it concern you, is about Zombies, and what happens to the survivors as they battle them. Qulle surprise. It's very good indeed, and not the "so bad it's good" or "good despite it being shit in places" type of good; it's all good and funny in the right places, doesn't last too long and contains no fluffy toss.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	10/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	10/4/2004

Star Trek
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Reboots are awfully fashionable nowadays aren't they kids? With your Hannah Montanas (review to follow once injunction lifted) and your High School Musicals (review to follow when flying pigs join the air force) seems there isn't much room for your ordinary homespun tales involving time travel and weird alien sex. I guess a reboot guarantees a built-in audience regardless of product quality, and so it is JJ "Lost and Mission Impossible 3" Abrams was taken on to resurrect a moribund franchise that had all but exhausted its potential following 5 TV series, made up of 28 seasons & 10 spin-off feature length films across 40 years. The Hollywood writer's strike only heightening the anticipation, word crept out this new Trek would show Kirk meeting Spock at the Starfleet academy. Only it's not your normal meeting in the standard Trekiverse you see. What Abrams has done is made time travel central to the plot, thereby eliminating any nasty pre-existing future, leaving a blank slate for any further Trek films (and there will be some, you can count on it). A Romulan from the future travels back to the time James Tiberius K is born to avenge the future destruction of his planet. Bingo, problem solved, no more continuity errors. So how do the modern day heroes match up to their past/future counterparts. Really well. Kirk is every bit the skirt chasing rule breaker you hoped he'd be, only edged out by the outstanding Zachary Quinto as Spock. Throw in a smoking hot Uhura, and the always entertaining Simon Pegg as Scotty, rounded off by Sulu, Checkov & the original series pilot episode Captain Pike (great nod) and you've got yourself a reboot there fella. Abrams throws in plenty of good meat for the Trekkers (red-shirt death, Uhura's first name, sexy green aliens) while keeping it engaging for the uninitiated. The story rips along without too much pondering, classy space battles and some hand-to-hands. I'd heard it was good, but it's really good.
Bagsy	9/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	7/10
General wierdness	9/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	22/5/2009

Supersize Me
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Morgan Shurlock sets himself the seemingly modest target of living on nothing but Mcdonalds for 30 days; 3 square meals with every item on the menu at least once, nothing apart from the menu and only "supersized" if asked. What happens to this fit and healthy man in that time ought to put you off fast fod for life, instead it made me want to have a Big Mac, and I haven't been to the restaurant for 15 years. He's ably backed up by the relevant stats and interesting graphs (kind of like Eric Schloss' Fast Food Nation) and plug-in professors telling us the things only the very stupid don't comprehend. It sounds like I'm cynically raising an eyebrow but you can't argue with the fact that Mcdonalds recently introduced salad and dropped Supersize within weeks of the film airing, just that it seems a shame it takes such obvious finger pointing to make a change. Long live documentaries at the cinema though.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	6/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	3/10/2004

Syriana
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	The sort of film that lifts the veil of self-serving hypocrisy of the western world, for a moment, to give a glimpse of the world as it is, rather than how our leaders would have us believe. It concerns a Texas oil company's attempts to secure an oil pipeline involving the made-up middle-eastern country Syriana (what happened in the film really did happen) and the murky, dirty politics that go along with it. You could rightly argue that many of the characters aren't talking to each other, and are in fact screaming at the camera to you the public to wake up and notice what the world's only superpower is doing over there, and what it won't stop at to get what it wants, but since I'm biased I'll let it go. Matt Damon, Clooney, Dr Bashir from DS9, and tons more fill out the ensemble piece. It's complicated, will take quite a few viewings to take all the cloak & dagger stuff in, but that may be because I'm stupid and have to have all the endings of films explained to me.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	7/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	6/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	AVI
Date added	16/2/2006

The Bourne Ultimatum
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	The Bourne films, as Matt Damon asserted in a recent interview, have supplanted Bond as the dominant action franchise. Bond belongs to an imperial past, a superior chauvinist who drinks too much and is too cold about murder. Jason Bourne is certainly not the sort of man who upon despatching a deadly hitman, would pop out a dry one-liner and head straight for a shag. I don't think he even eats or goes to the bathroom. If one were critical, he's too much of a killing machine; glass windows, 10-storey drops, car pile-ups and multiple punch-ups come and go with only a couple of bruised knuckles to show for it. Never the less, they're awesome fun to watch, even if the shakey camerawork does start to give you a headache after a while. It's a fitting conclusion to an excellent trilogy about the nature of identity and responsibility, and Bourne does at least get the answers he's looking for.
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	6/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	30/8/2007

The Departed
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	A remake of the Hong Kong film "Infernal Affairs", brought to us in English by Martin "Marty" Scorsese (as an aside, go to the www.theonion.com and see his next project, 3 hours begging for an oscar). Transferred to Boston, Matt "Matt Damon" Damon is the pupil of crime boss Jack Nicholson, sent into the police to work as a mole. Leonardo Di Caprio is a cop sent to infiltrate Nicholson's gang, each man trying to find the other. There's an impeccable supporting cast with Alec "Beetlejuice" Baldwin, Ray "where's your tool?" Winstone & Martin "Mr President" Sheen. The real surprise package, nearly stealing the whole film, is Mark "Marky Mark" Wahlberg as a foul-mouthed (EVERYONE is foul-mouthed in this movie) undercover detective. Joker Jack doesn't so much chew scenery as have it wrapped in a doggy bag and taken home for supper, but you let him away, it's Jack after all. Leo & Matt are both excellent. But it's Scorsese's masterwork behind the camera that you remember the most. The 2 1/2 hours fly by, his talent for pacing, narrative, editing, and flash but not flashy camera work, keep the film moving, helped by a very snappy script. There's traces of his familiar themes here (father/son, guilt and redemption, the role of the church) but they don't overload the film, though they sometimes threaten to. As it's a remake, the Hong Kong philosophy of graphic violence and fatal shootouts sometimes sit uneasily with the more Catholic elements, but it's a very minor nitpick. Scorses shouldn't win the oscar for this, as he should have won so many times before (Dances With Wolves beat Goodfellas ffs) but it's a pleasure to see just how good his films can still be.
Bagsy	6/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	5/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	6/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	27/10/2006

The Downfall
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Oliver Hirschbiege's film has been portrayed in certain sections of the media as a brave move, though a controversial attempt, to "humanise" Adolph Hitler, by playing him pretty much how he was in the last two weeks of his reign. Cornered in his bunker, close friends and advisors deserting him while only the fanatical stay until the bitter end, Hitler (the mesmorising Bruno Ganz) holds on to his delusions about final victory. When the reality that his 1000 year reich is about to fall comes bleeding through and he sees all is lost he turns on his generals, ranting and screaming at his betrayal and the incompetence of those that have stuck by him through it all; shockingly sentencing the German people to death by refusing to consider surrender or even dialogue with the allies. Certainly a man of his word, he deduces that since the German people have failed to win the war every single one of them deserves death, survival of the fittest etc. By no means an easy watch, there's considerably disturbing material on offer (think children and cyanide) but the real revelation is the controversy mentioned above; as if seeing what Hitler was actually like in some way "humanises" him. What utter toss, he's every bit as terrifying as you've heard about; pointing out he loved his dog, didn't drink or eat meat, and could be kindly on occasion hardly justifies the monstrous crimes of the holocaust, or the slaughter of millions in war and indeed of those people he claimed to represent, it just means he's a lot closer to all of us human beings. It logically follows that the capability for great evil is in every one of us given the right (or wrong) circumstances. That, more than anything in this film, is what should terrify us.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	4/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	24/4/2005

The Machinist
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	A must-see mention for this terrific piece of work. Christian "does it come in black?" Bale shed 5 stone to play a man who has not slept for a year and is haunted by visions that may or not be real. Evoking memories of head-fuck suspenseful Memento or Sixth sense, yet still seperated from them by some original ideas and a supremely committed central performance (put it this way, you SEE the weight loss on a near skeletal Bale) If I'm not mistaken, my first non-cinema review of a film for the 303. God bless Divx players.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	5/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	4/10
Format	AVI
Date added	6/8/2005

The Matrix
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	It's the matrix - nothing else really needs saying other than bagsy trinity :)
Bagsy	6/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DIVX/dvdrip
Date added	8/4/2002

The Matrix Reloaded
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Not quite 10/10 as the picky part of me found the metaphysical circular logic a bit unnecessarily baffling. Bit slow to get going too, but fuck it, you're going to watch it anyway, and it still kicks mighty arse. It's not Return Of The King (what is) but can't wait until November for Matrix Resolutions.
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	8/10
General wierdness	9/10
Comedy	7/10
Format	As God Intended
Date added	23/5/2003

The matrix revolutions
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	This only got a 9 because... well we've already had two matrices, so we're already kinda expecting some mad shit... [19:10] i wann go see matrix [19:10] me too [19:10] go see it [19:10] it rocks [19:11] lots of *RAAAH* [19:11] and "fuck me" [19:11] and "ooer" [19:11] that's my official review
Bagsy	8/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	10/10
Cars	7/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	2/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	9/11/2003

The Onion Movie
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	I owe several beers to the administrator of 303 for informing me of the The Onion website, as it has provided me with years of laugh out loud joy; although in recent times, like Viz & The Simpsons the quality has dipped somewhat. Like it's yellow-coloured, animated kin, The Onion Movie probably comes a few years too late to the big screen, but it's still excellent all the same, if a little shapeless. Essentially, it's a series of sketches, news reports and adverts, loosely tied together to a news anchor getting increasingly frustrated with the corporate takeover of the news. But when you have light-hearted rape gags, technology geeks and way-out Onion-style irony, it's a great laugh for an hour and twenty so it doesn't outstay its welcome.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	3/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	9/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	7/6/2008

The Passion Of The Christ
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Jesus Christ. I kept repeating, to myself, as He was scourged, again and again. And again. And again. Then made to carry the cross to Calvary, and again as he was nailed to the cross and left to die. I'm not a Christian, I don't believe in God and I'm a firm believer in "made up to keep the people down" when it comes to religion, but you have to give Mel Gibson his due for conveying the last 12 hours of Jesus with all the brutality and conviction of a believer. Whether you think it actually happened didn't matter to me as I saw the story of a man put to death for what he believed. Love, Forgiveness and Compassion. There's no anti-semitism to speak of, no gratuity like you'd get in a Jerry "Pearl Harbour, Bad Boys" Bruckheimer movie where you are the one inflicting the violence. This time the violence is inflicted on you and there's no escape. OK, there's one too many slow-motions of Jesus falling to the ground as he gives way under the weight of the cross, and you could criticise the lack of political or social context, but that wasn't the film Gibson was trying to mkae. It is The Passion Of The Christ, what this one man went through to carry the sins of us all. If you believe that, that is, which I don't, but you come away with respect for what it means to have faith and what you're prepared to go through for it nonetheless.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	5/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	24/3/2004

The Salton Sea
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Badass film! Not only does it have some *beautiful* imagery like Val Kilmer playing a trumpet in a burning room at the start but it has more twists than a world class bendy-straw and a great little journey into the world of the hardcore tweaker with suitable lunatics encountered en route. I hope this film will be as big as it ought to be. Watch it!
Bagsy	2/10
Explosions & carnage	4/10
Guns & fighting	7/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	1/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	VCD screener
Date added	1/9/2002

The Wind That Shakes The Barley
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	No stranger to controversy, Ken "Kes" Loach has provoked the ire from many ignorant Englishmen who slagged off the film's alleged one-sided point of view, despite the considerable handicap of not having watched the bloody thing. Yuo can't get away from it's one-sided nature, but how else do you portray occupied and oppressed people fighting for their freedom? Would you accuse WWII films of bias in favour of the allies? It shows the relationship of 2 brothers caught up in the Irish republican movement of the early 1920s, with Cillian "28 Days Later" Murphy in the leading role. It's not really a film that can easily appeal to the uninformed, as events go by so quickly you need to know the history of that time to fully understand it. Which does make it a little of "preaching to the converted" as people who know it probably won't learn anytihng new, and those that don't may find themselves a little lost. All the same, without the background reading it's still more than watchable as a group of ordinary people are forced to take up arms to defend themselves. More importantly, it's an essential film to be made while the leaders of our country mendaciously talk about "terrorism" and "freedom" and "our way of life", as pointing out the UK's brutal occupation history around the world shows Blair/Reid for the liars and hypocrites they truly are. It provoked such hysterical reactions precisely because of this. The British establishment lies to itself by crowing endlessly about "Democracy" and "the civilisation of these lands", so any attempt to show an alternate (and more accurate) viewpoint are naturally seen as heretical and satanic by those with most to lose. Didn't mean to turn Film 303 into Streaky's Soapbox by the way, but I believe we all have a responsibility to speak truth to power.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	3/10
Format	AVI
Date added	6/10/2006

Trailer Park Boys Movie - Big Dirty
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Apparently shot between Season 6 & 7 around 2006, yet not released (certainly in the states) until just recently, the boys make the leap to big screen. The only significant difference is the lack of smoking on-screen, but otherwise it's business as usual following Ricky, Julian & Bubbles' latest get rich quick through crime scheme. The Big Dirty is the score criminals think they can do after leaving jail that always leads to them back inside. In the boys case, it's stealing a large amount of change. You need a certain familiarity with the series to get the most out of it as you'd expect, but the film stands by itself well enough, although you probably need to have watched later seasons to understand Jim Lahey's "30 days Julian, 30 sexy days" as well as all the numerous homo-erotic references sprinkled throughout.
Bagsy	6/10
Explosions & carnage	5/10
Guns & fighting	8/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	6/10
General wierdness	9/10
Comedy	9/10
Format	Avi
Date added	24/1/2008

Two Towers
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Does what it says on the tin...rude film! - I got the impression this is something of a "spacer" between fellowship and return of the king, but i think that's possibly how it is in the books (I only got up to just before helm's deep kicked off in the book). The characters are ace as you'd expect, the CG gollum is superbly done, lots of fire, orcs and general ass kicking on a massive scale. The ents scored the comedy point and also a fair proportion of the ass-kicking points.
Bagsy	9/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	9/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	DivX dvdrip
Date added	29/1/2003

Undercover Brother
Person	Tasty	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Funny as fuck with afros
Bagsy	9/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	2/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	2/10
General wierdness	1/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	Broadband
Date added	8/5/2003

Vanilla Sky
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Decent-ish quality, good sound, great film, bagsy bagsy bagsy bagsy Cameron Diaz
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	1/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	1/10
General wierdness	9/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	VCD
Date added	8/4/2002

Wall-E
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	I'll tell you a funny thing that's happening in Cinema at the moment; movies that have really challenging and unusal first half-hours before a second half that tends to be more conventional. As evidence; I Am Legend, There Will Be Blood, Hancock, Incredible Hulk, Iron Man. While in a lot of cases the second half tends to be less good, probably as the need for box-office bangs and explosions outweighs artistic considerations, Wall-E like Blood, however, is a triumph. Set on a far-future trashcan Earth, Wall-E is a junk compacting robot with only a cockroach for company; building enormous sky-scrapers from the things that he finds; things that the everyday folks leave behind. It's in this first half that you just marvel at how god damn good Pixar are at animating. Wall-E is Short Circuit's Number 5 crossed with ET: The Extra Terrestrial, a living if not breathing creature. You feel his loneliness, his compassion, and you genuinely want him to score hot sex with the female robot Eve when she arrives to check for signs of life. Obeying Kermode's Law Of Sci-FI #1: The Future Is Now, Wall-E encounters what remains of the human race on a space station; having been waited on hand & foot with food and drink by service-bots, our future descendants now resemble marshmallows unable to see beyond their monitors. Sound at all familiar? I don't know how Pixar do it; while I've not "loved" every film they've done, I've certainly not found a great deal to criticise about any of them either. That's 8 in a row going back to Toy Story. Kids love Wall-E's cute little actions, appreciating the tender and care and love the animators put into each frame for maximum effect. Grown-ups will love what the kids love, but also the political message of the consequence of our actions, including the 2001: A Space Odyssey & Silent Running tributes. One to watch again and again, 8 in a row.
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	6/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	1/8/2008

Welcome to Colinwood
Person	Tomboy	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	Dunno why I liked it really. LMAO all the way through though ver, very wierd. Similar to Brother Where Art Thou' in odd stylee and George Clonneys appearance is thankfully, brief...
Bagsy	2/10
Explosions & carnage	2/10
Guns & fighting	1/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	9/10
Format	DivX
Date added	10/12/2003

xXx
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	When i first heard about this it was introduced as a kind of "super james bond" and ultimately that's not far off the mark. There's a large degree of the "rah!" element of Fast n Furious (in fact i wouldn't be surprised if it was the same director - see how well informed I am!), lots of rude weapons, fast cars, good bagsies and enough explosions to keep even tasty happy, topped off with a slightly blade-esque coolness of delivery. If does seem like an amalgamation of lots of different films but they're the coolest bits of all of them so who cares :). To be fair it does have it's cheesy moments, but i think the enthusiasm for what they were trying to do lets them get away with it. Get it now!
Bagsy	8/10
Explosions & carnage	9/10
Guns & fighting	9/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	9/10
General wierdness	3/10
Comedy	1/10
Format	VCD (cam)
Date added	18/8/2002

Zodiac
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	The Zodiac killer worked his murderous trade around the California bay area in the late 60s and early 70s before seemingly retiring without being caught. He used to tease the Police and local journalists with cryptic (though actually fairly easy to decrypt) messages and clues to his identity. The male Gyllenhal, Jake, is a cartoonist for the paper, Robert Downey Jnr is the jaded, drunkard writer, and Mark Ruffalo the cop completing the triangle of men whose obsession with finding Zodiac takes over, and ultimately ruins, their lives. As you'd expect from director David "Fight Club, Se7en" Fincher, it's terrifically watchable, even after the trail goes cold and sometimes years can go by without a new lead from the killer. The film, although on some levels a detective story eliminating the suspects by analysing the evidence, raises interesting points about the importance of finding a man who in fact has been responsible for less deaths than the traffic lanes in LA over a 3-month period. As Gyllenhal's home life disintegrates, the film becomes more about a man who won't let it go than a killer who has a thing for puzzles.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	5/10
Guns & fighting	5/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	AVI
Date added	23/10/2007

Zoolander
Person	Rhiannon	Comments
Overall rating	9/10	hilariously wierd I loved this movie
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	5/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	2/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	10/10
Format	divx
Date added	31/7/2002

21 Grams
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	That's a slightly messy one. Somewhat magnolia-meets-memento with a hangover. Not for the haint-farted.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	3/10
Zombies & undead	1/10
Cars	1/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	Divx
Date added	22/3/2004

30 Meters of Silence
Person	Ashli Haward	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	A Great story of 7 refugees kids
Bagsy	0/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	Doc
Date added	13/7/2003

A Beautiful mind
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	This is a great quality rip of a great film. Apparently based on a true story it centres around a genius but very spoddy mathemetician, unifying theories, onset of schitzophrenia etc etc - top stuff :) If you liked Pi you'll like this. If you never saw Pi go see it now, or don't - I'm not too fussed 'cos I seen them both anyway :)
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	0/10
Guns & fighting	0/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	6/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DIVX/dvdrip (2 disc)
Date added	12/4/2002

A Cock & Bull story
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	A film within a film, with a film. It's at least that many. Supposedly a film adaptation of the supposedly unfilmable "Life And Opinions Of Tristram Shandy", it in fact is half (or maybe a third) of that film, and then there's another film shot at the same time about the making of the film. Confused? Yeah, I was as well. It stars Steve "aha" Coogan playing himself trying to shake off the Partridge tag, Rob Brydon as his sidekick angling for co-star credit. So it's a film, about people trying to make a film, and the film they're trying to make. Then there's sub-plots of Coogan's affairs, his new-born son and girlfriend, Brydon's flummoxing over his potential co-star Gillian Anderson, Mark "you ain't seem me, right?" Williams as a 17th century re-enactment buff, and lots more besides. It had every chance of being the worst in-joke back-slapping wank-athon, but it isn't. I don't think it's brilliant either, but certainly original.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	4/10
Guns & fighting	5/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	8/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	4/2/2006

A History Of Violence
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Nearly a fortnight after seeing this film, I still don't know what to think or to say about David Cronenberg's latest, much less what, or whether I'd recommend to someone else. I won't tell you much of the plot, only that owner of a diner Viggo "Aragorn" Mortensen becomes a local hero stopping 2 nutters with guns, who attracts the attention of mob boss Ed "shit loads of films" Harris, where upon the film gets a bit weird. Or dull. Or predictable, or totally unpredictable depending on what mood you're in when you watch it. I can eaisily see someone hating this, or thinking it's the best film of the year, or maybe you'll think it's alright with some good bits. I still don't know what to think
Bagsy	6/10
Explosions & carnage	8/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	4/10
General wierdness	10/10
Comedy	4/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	19/10/2005

A knight's tale
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	I didn't really know anything about this but it's actually a kinda cool story about a 3 peasants who make it big in the Jousting circuit and all the associated shenannigans which ensue. Genuine feelgood factor in play and all round good clean fun. I really liked it.
Bagsy	4/10
Explosions & carnage	2/10
Guns & fighting	6/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	0/10
Comedy	4/10
Format	Divx (approx vcd size but nicely watchable)
Date added	3/5/2002

Adaptation
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	When i skipped through this to check the files it didn't exactly look thrilling... however it's all in the watching and it came up trumps. Lots of confusion between the multiple Nick cages etc, but all held together by a really twistey, turney yet introspective plot. And then it goes oink...and you're elsewhere completely.
Bagsy	4/10
Explosions & carnage	1/10
Guns & fighting	2/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	VCD
Date added	7/3/2003

Amores Perros (Love's a bitch)
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Spanish film with subtitles, but very much in a pulp-fiction meets magnolia-type series of interwoven ironic coincidences and knock on effects. Also slightly remeniscent of "Go" (i think - the clubbing one with the yellow mx5 in it?) and Run Lola Run in it's showing-the-same-thing-from-different-angles kinda way, but not as predictable in it's execution. It's not a short film by any stretch, but um dunno really - just have to watch it i guess.
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	1/10
Guns & fighting	3/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	6/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	Divx (dvdrip)
Date added	22/4/2002

Artificial Intelligence
Person	bensaan	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	excellent quality with the bonus of ac3 audio - sweet... mad film, altho it carries a caution of talking teddy bears which is just not normal - will scare the fek outta ya... well me anyway...
Bagsy
Explosions & carnage
Guns & fighting
Zombies & undead
Cars
General wierdness
Comedy	0/10
Format	divx/dvdrip
Date added	8/4/2002

Atonement
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Unfilmable book adaptations are very in at the moment. Ian Mcewan's Atonement is another that was said to be impossible to bring to the screen, but Joe Wright just wouldn't listen. It's set just before WWII on a hot summer's day in the country house of the Tallis family. The youngest girl Briony, watches her elder sister Cecilia (Keira Knightley) strip off and dive into a fountain seemingly at the instruction of Robbie Turner (James Mcavoy) the lad who works for the family. As a result of Briony's misunderstanding due to her young age and gift for dramatic invention a chain of events is started that will change the family forever. Probably not everyone's cup of tea on 303, but as a big fan of the book I was hoping they wouldn't mess with it and I'm glad to say they haven't. James Mcavoy is surely the best actors from these shores at the moment, and while lots of people think Keira Knightley is a pretty clothes horse, I think she's excellent in this. It's a film that contains very powerful themes of redemption, regret, and yes, atonement, across a lifetime. One to broaden the mind.
Bagsy	10/10
Explosions & carnage	6/10
Guns & fighting	6/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	AVI
Date added	27/12/2007

Batmin Begins
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Daddy's boy Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) wants to use his fabulous wealth to help people, just like his father did. Good for him. He's so much better than us lowly scum isn't he? Because he's suffered (dead dad) and he cares you see, we're supposed to sympathise with a grown man who has Michael "Zulus" Caine as his lifelong fawning serf. Once again playing to the University Challenge, Elitist, Ivory Towers dichotomy that ordinary people are too stupid, pathetic and boring to do anything for themselves, we have yet another superhero flick to rescuing us from the depths of our uselessness. It's actually the best there's ever been, having been made by Christopher "Memento" Nolan, supported by Gary "mickey mouse bullshit" Oldham, Morgan "rehabilitated, it's just a bullshit word" Freeman, Rutger "Guinness" Hauer, and Liam "I could have done more" Neeson. As well as yer standard whizz bangs there's a proper story, character development and motivation for why Bruce does what he does with some rather non-blockbuster adult themes (the nature of criminality and futility of revenge) but again it's rather cynically setup for a sequel a la Daredevil and that fucking Spider one. Still, as I say, it's better than any other superhero movie. I just hate superheroes as a rule, don't know if those feelings seeped through at all.
Bagsy	8/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	8/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	10/10
General wierdness	7/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	19/6/2005

Blade 2
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Decent-ish quality conisdering it's so new, top film, much better than I thought it would be.
Bagsy	3/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	7/10
Zombies & undead	7/10
Cars	1/10
General wierdness	5/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	VCD
Date added	8/4/2002

Boogie nights
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Not quite in the same league as magnolia but very much that feel, all in 70s clothes and with waay more drugs. Pleasantly surprised.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	4/10
Guns & fighting	4/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	3/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	Divx
Date added	14/5/2003

Bourne Identity
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Excellent all round film - apparently there's a couple of copies floating around, mine was reasonably decent quality (link from sharereactor). Good plot, good characters, reasonable bagsy, a car chase through paris of similar proportions to the one in Ronin only not *quite* as mad, lots of sneaky beaky & secret squirrel action, running around fields with guns and people mysteriously getting caps popped in their asses. Top All Round Film.
Bagsy	5/10
Explosions & carnage	6/10
Guns & fighting	6/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	8/10
General wierdness	3/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	VCD
Date added	11/10/2002

Butterfly effect
Person	LD50	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	Whilst possibly not *quite* as fucked up as Requiem for a dream this is definitely one of those messy ones. This twisted puppy sees the dark haired guy from "dude where's my money back" (sorry I'm crap with actors names) in a serious role about a guy who can affect past events by reading his journals and going off on a wibbly one...since things are kinda messed up when he figures this out it naturally seemed like a cracking idea to go back and od things differently... but oh what about the knock-on effects...never thought of that did you? Inevitable shenannigans ensue...
Bagsy	6/10
Explosions & carnage	7/10
Guns & fighting	6/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	0/10
General wierdness	8/10
Comedy	0/10
Format	DivX
Date added	16/8/2004

Casino Royale
Person	Streaky	Comments
Overall rating	8/10	James Blonde, Bond is Blond, shrieked the headlines as Daniel Craig's name was announced for the latest re-launch of the franchise. These simpering toady hacks duly ate their words once the film had, you know, been made and viewed. Craig is your balls-out Bond, not one to think twice before popping caps in various crevices, and even speedier to let his fists do the talking. Plots, girls and mcguffins are irrelevant here. It's Bond FFS. But it's a Bond closer to OHMSS (the George Lazenby one) in that it's unlike the usual formula. More like The Bond Supremacy. Daniel Craig gives us what Moore (my personal favourite) and certainly the Scottish thug were unable to; the reaction from the audience that we want to know more about him. We're interested. And if the ending is anything to go by, we'll get what we want.
Bagsy	7/10
Explosions & carnage	10/10
Guns & fighting	10/10
Zombies & undead	0/10
Cars	8/10
General wierdness	3/10
Comedy	5/10
Format	Cinema
Date added	26/11/2006